Date of Entry: 9/5/06 About a year ago I used to go to McDonalds every day at like 6:30 AM and get a bacon egg and cheese biscuit. Did I say every day? I meant twice. But during those two times, I saw some things that really amazed me. The first time I went there, I ordered and I sat in a little booth, and there was this huge group of like hicks, and they were talking about what they hated about their grandchildren! The second time I went, the hicks were there (I guess they came everyday), but they were talking about something else and I couldn't even hear them. But while I was standing in line, there was a guy in front of me who was talking to the cash register lady about how he had to take care of his grandson all day. He was like "His parents are both gone so I'm stuck with him all day! I had things to do and now I have to have him all day." He said some other bad stuff but I can't exactly remember it. In a slightly related but also very different story, I was talking to a guy online and he told me that his "dumbass nephew" was coming to stay with him for a few days. All of this made me think, "Is this how my relatives think of me?" I'm not sure, but if I had to take a guess, I would say yes.

Having trouble in school, work, or just life all over? Well, after some serious thought, I have found a solution to all of life's problems. While it is risky, if it goes right, you are set, perhaps for even years! So what is this magical make-life-good pill I've created? Ironically, in some cases, it could be a pill. The secret is drugs, and it can't be marijuana. I'm talking ectasy (the pill), crack, heroine, coke (not the drink), meth, that kind of stuff. What do drugs have to do with being successful? Don't they make your life worse? Let me explain, my good fellows. I've noticed that when people do hard drugs, all anybody cares about is getting them off. They don't care about how they're doing in school or work, as long as they're off the drug. Get where I'm going? So if you get addicted, or even just pretend to get addicted, to a drug, then all you have to do is get off it, and people will be so proud of you that they won't care if you fail school or quit work, just being off the stuff is good enough. You could probably ride it for a year or longer. Example: "Honey, shouldn't you go back to school?" "I'm off the crack, isn't that good enough??!" "You're right, sorry." See what I mean?

Of course, this plan would hurt you in the long run, so I actually suggest not doing it. In fact, I'm kidding, and I forbid you from partaking in it. If you do it, then I don't care, I don't know who you are. I just don't know anymore...